It wasn’t until I watched the Sims 3 Twilight New Moon parody trailer that I realized you could put makeup on male Sims. I decided to fancy up Mister Willis a little bit.

It makes him look rather Ozzy Osborne, doesn’t it? I think it’s the combination of his advanced age (91) and all that eyeliner.

When not applying makeup to helpless old men, I busied myself making the girls do their homework.

Tragedy! I forgot to pay a bill, and their dollhouse was repo’d.

Once the girls finished their homework, as a reward I sent them out with Willis to the beach just over the cliff.

They had a blast fishing, even though they didn’t catch a thing.

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In addition to repairing appliances, changing diapers, feeding babies, cleaning up the dishes, taking out the trash, buying groceries, paying the bills, and scrubbing the toilet, Willis also trains toddlers how to talk.

Please note they are basically wearing the same outfit.

Meanwhile, Kay kept plugging away at her novels. She finished a Drama novel I named Trist-Sim Shandy and a Mystery novel I named Murder on the Shang Simla Express.

“No one will find me in here!”

Finally the toddlers grew into little girls.

Opal looks really fretful about the toilet situation!

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Kay waddled across the street to the hospital and gave birth there. Then she returned home with her new twin girls, Pearl and Opal!

(Kay is smiling while thinking about a politician’s podium. I decided that she must be thinking about something funny she saw on The Daily Show. Happens to me all the time.)

My secret to having twins is to play the radio set to the Kids station during the entire pregnancy. That damned Kids music about drives me crazy, but it does the trick. If you’re pressed for time, double down by playing the Kids radio station while your pregnant Sim reads a pregnancy book.

Willis can now swing into action, acting as the primary caregiver while Kay works on her novels. He does a pretty good job of taking care of the babies.

Lullaby, baby spliff
May you sleep through the whole night
I won’t smoke you, I promise,
It’s better than making maggot jokes.

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